You’ve got an open bar and your ceremony goes until midnight, what do you tell your friends with kids? The pros and cons of having an “adults-only wedding”.

Your dream wedding might be a lush ballroom filled with charming couples dancing late into the night; a champagne fountain bubbling away in the background. Or maybe your ideal wedding is a tame garden affair with brunch-y bloody marys and mimosas but still it’s within your rights to want to keep your event child-free. It might sound rude or harsh but if you feel the ceremony or reception might not be fun for little ones you shouldn’t feel bad about wanting an adults-only day. After all, it’s your wedding and you need to do what’s right for you and your partner. Family expectations and traditions are hard to buck but think about it this way: many of your friends with kids might welcome the idea of taking a night off to join you for your big day!

If you make the decision that you would like your wedding to be adults only just make sure you make the necessary preparations. Let your guests know well in advance so they can arrange for childcare or consider this in their wedding response. It can be tricky to know how exactly to communicate that you would like your wedding to be adults only. The most direct way is to specify on your invitation a certain age cut off. You could include a clause such as “no children under the age of 12” or even higher or simply write “no children please”. That could be misinterpreted or come off as really harsh though so a way to subtly say that children aren’t invited to your wedding is to address the invitation specifically to the people you want to attend.

Instead of inviting “The Jones Family” to the wedding perhaps specifically address the invitation to “Mr and Mrs Jones”. While that is subtle you could try to spread the word through trusted confidants that this wedding is not a kid friendly affair.
However you choose to phrase it don’t be afraid of blowback. This is your special day and you want everyone to feel comfortable–regardless of age.

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